Honor Page 22

Signal Company was on the east end of a relatively new three and one half story edifice, a far cry from my previous lodging at Fort Carson and Fort Monmouth. This became my home for the next three years. It was a weekend, as the 'Charge of Quarters' did not want to mess with us. He had some one give us a mattress, sheets, pillow and a couple blankets . As we collected our bedding the smell of smoke lingered in the basement. Later we learned that an unhappy 'joker' set fire to his mattress and stuffed it into an empty locker.
I thought to myself 'what kind of a hell hole am getting into?' After getting settled into a four person room with one vacant bed, I later learned that the missing occupant was down in the zone, G2 ing (another new word for my expanding vocabulary). He had been accepted into a University in Heidelberg with the Army picking up the tab. Sounded like a good deal to me. Anyway, some time after getting a bed and bedding I returned to 'Charge of Quarters' office with two other new arrivals. We asked about getting out the gate. The CQ said that as long as we were in class A and with our travel orders we could go out but had to be back before midnight. Away we went to the nearest taxi stand. A kindly older gentleman said he would give us a brief tour of the attractions for 'very' few marks. At that time $ 5 in script would get you 21 D-Marks . He drove us through Ku'damm , past the Brandenburg Gate, down to the Telefunken and past an electronic sign board displaying in large letters, the latest news for the East Berlin populace to read. Maybe that is what upset the Russians.

Monday morning we met and received a welcoming speech from the first Sergeant. We were put on a bus to take us to the Headquarters (OMGUS) building on Clayallee which would become our place of employment for, in my case, the next three years. At HQ we met the Photo officer, a Lieutenant. that had little if any interest in photography. His office was on the first floor where passport photos and ID photos were taken, the Lab was in the basement next to the coffee, dough nut and Berliner shop.
To make a long story short , I was assigned to work in the lab processing film and the printing the same. 90 percent of our work was to support the Military Mission out of Potsdam. Russian airplanes and construction progress in the East and other excitement. We were required to print two copies of everything as one copy was to go to the Russians. One photograph in particular created a great deal of excitement in the East. It was an shot of a East German airman who was sound asleep on a stack of ammo boxes. We were asked to print 25 8x10s of this view. For reason, unknown to us, (ha ha) his face came out blurred which prevented positive identification . I am certain we saved his 'stripes' or a one way ticket to hell.
Two German civilians also worked in the lab. They also 'took' formal portraits . These fellows were in the German Army, on the Eastern front during the war. They seldom talked of their experiences. One of the few stories , that I shall never forget and that I believe to be true, is during the Winter, the German Army was bogged down outside of Stalingrad. At the first sign of daylight they were ordered out of their fox holes which were covered with scrap lumber, ammo boxes , anything to keep the snow off while they attempted to rest. During the night their breathing created little pockets of steam rising through the snow which pin pointed the location of someone alive under the snow. Their assignment was to drop a grenade down these little holes. They didn't know if they were doing away with Russians or some of their own troops. How would you like that duty?
After about six months I was as a PFC in charge of the lab. It seemed that the other guys with rank had a problem making the midnight curfew. This was a great assignment,- the daily work schedule, go for coffee, eat a 'Berliner' (round piece of cake, also known as 'Pfannkuchen'), catch the duty bus back to Andrews for lunch, catch the bus back HQ etc.
Sometime during that first year I asked to be assigned as a PIO Photographer to support the Observer and other Public Information photography. The uniform was 'class A' along with an Official US Army Photographer ID card. I was able to gain entrance into many events without paying for tickets. One of the many was a Louis Armstrong show. Another show was the Benny Goodman's opening night at a new 'Sportplatz' located close to the old high banked turn on the 'Avus'. (Highway or Autobahn to West-Germany)
As duty photographers we supported the PMO on accident investigations. We had to contact the motor pool for a taxi which took time. One late night investigation I happened to mention to the OIC that if I had a personal car it would eliminate at least one hour of waiting time. He said that he was the acting PMO and if I put my request in to buy a car within the next two days he would sign the request. Soon afterwards, I became the proud owner of a 1939 Mercedes. As far as I know, I was the only E 3 at Andrews that had a car. Shortly after that the MP's started to take their own accident photos. As a PIO photographer I had many interesting assignments and life long lessons. A few I'll cover.

One of things I'll never forget is 'Don't be early for an appointment'. A new 2nd Lt. picked up a visiting U.S. congressman at Tempelhof and took him to HQ and they arrived 4 minutes early for a meeting with General Hamlet. A full Colonel, by the name of Barcowski , who served as the General's Chief of Staff called this inexperienced Lt. aside and gave him a royal chewing out that he would never forget.
Another incident with Col. Barcowski was when he requested a photographer for a 'grip and grin' ( shake hands and smile into the camera) photo in his office. I went upstairs to his office with my trusty Speed Graphic camera with only one film holder, two pieces of film. The Col. at the last minute, decided to have three additional photos taken. I explained my lack of planning and he said 'hurry down to the lab for additional film and get back as soon as possible'. On the way down the stairs a 1st Lt. from the 'Gator farm' stopped me and informed me that when meeting an officer in the hallway I was to stop walking, running in my case, and come to attention until the officer passed by. I said to this walking piece of ego that Col. Barcowski has given me two minutes to be back in his office or he would have my rear end. If I was late the Lt.'s name would be brought into the conversation. His reply was 'very well carry on'. I was in the Col.'s office many times during the remainder of my tour.
The highlight of my interaction with the Colonel was when I had just enough time in grade to be promoted to Specialist 5 . On a Saturday afternoon, as I was leaving Truman Hall, Col B. was coming in. He called me over and put his arm around my shoulder and said: 'Wilson I have a favor to ask of you?' The Photo Lab compiled a series of photos of before and after the destruction of Berlin. He said that he wanted to send his brother a set of these photos. I have no idea why he didn't ask the Signal Officer for them. I said: 'Yes SIR'. At the time the Colonel was making his request to me, with his arm on my shoulder, the Battalion Sgt. Major and the CO of Signal Company walked through the door. They saw me in deep conversation with the Colonel. Guess who was on the list of newly promoted E5's?
One of my most memorable photo assignments was to cover the arrival of a U.S. Congressmen from the great state of Michigan by the name of Gerald Ford, yes that one. His plane landed on the civilian side of Tempelhof and his official greeting party was on the Military side. Some how my Army taxi driver, a wonderful old German by the name of Klaus, got us to the correct location . While waiting for the official U.S. Army greeters I had a delightful time with the Fords. More on that later.
One other event that stands out in my mind was an 4th of July celebration at the Harnack House.( Officers Club) The U.S. Army Commander hosts a luncheon, cocktail, and 'chowder' party for all high ranking Officers of the Four Powers in Berlin My assignment was to take a 'grip and grin' of ALL Russian officers for identification purposes. General Hamlet and Gen. Duncan were aware of my assignment so it was a very easy day.
Also I was in Mayor Willy Brandt's office on different occasions photographing visiting VIPs. One of the visitors was Senator Green from one of the new England States, who at that time was the oldest living U.S. Senator. The meeting was delayed due to the lack of an interpreter, The Senator said 'this is nonsense I speak German, so why wait'. The second time was a 'grip & grin' with our Ambassador, Mr. Hillerbrandt and the Mayor. Incidentally Willy Brandt married a Swedish lady while in the German Army that was occupying Sweden during the war.
One assignment that I missed out on was photographing a Berliner who became a local hero. He was a garbage collector, with a TEAM (2) of horses and a wagon. He would drive his TEAM ( 2 ) of horses through the Brandenburg gate, past the Russian War Memorial. He would spend the entire day in the Tiergarten area loading his wagon. After the Russian guards changed shift he and his ONE horse and wagon would return to the East. I don't know what happened to the second horse. They said that he was a great horse trader but his horse trading stopped when someone turned him in. Fortunately he was in the West when that happened. So much for the Army side of my stay in Berlin. One of the members of Signal Co. married the daughter of a British Captain. I was invited to the wedding. As I and Sgt. H. were entering the chapel we met a British Warrant Officer coming out. He said that the priest was just getting warmed up and the ceremony would last for at least 30-45 minutes more and that we should accompany him to the NAAFI club (Navy, Army, Air Force, Institutes ) for a beer or two. This chance meeting started a friendship that lasted until I rotated two years later. Through Warrant Officer Frank E. I met some of his fellow soldiers in the British Army who were true gentlemen in every respect. One of the Brits was the driver for the Commanding Officer of British troops in Berlin. When his CO was out of town, which was often, Paddy S. played Rugby and drank a huge quantity of Berliner Kindl. His other duties were never mentioned.

On many occasions, we were invited to the NAAFI Club where we were served Fish and Chips, plus some liquid refreshments. On Friday evenings they served Russian caviar. The joke was that the Russian knew better than to eat fish eggs so they sold it to the Brits, who in turn served it to their US Army guests. I soon developed a taste for it. Haven't tasted it since leaving Berlin in 1959.
I was invited, on many occasions, to dinner with Warrant Officer Frank E-- and his family. He and his wife Elly had three well mannered children who for some unknown reason liked me. One memorable dinner was on New Years eve 1957. Another guest was the Quartermaster of their Unit by the name of Less P.
On Boxer Day which is the day after Christmas, the Officers and Warrant Officers in the British Armed services, serve each enlisted man, in bed, a 'shot of Nelson's Blood' which is 180 proof rum. After a couple of shots of 'Nelson's Blood' I am certain they felt that they could wipe out the entire Spanish Armada single handedly. Quartermaster Less P. through his excellent planning received a few bottles more than was authorized. Needlessly to say, one bottle kept a house full of guests and a new neighbours in a happy mood all night and into the next day.
All work and no play makes an unhappy GI. Thus, during a planning and attitude adjustment session at the 'Stork Club' five of us over worked members of the Signal Company came up with the idea that we should visit the Worlds Fair in Brussels. Ernie L. had his 48 Ford 'Staff car' and I had my trusty Mercedes. We saved our gasoline stamps which allowed us to purchase gas at the Post Exchanges. Soon after payday our 'convoy' of two automobiles and five GIs hit the Autobahn to the zone. Bill H., Terry C., were in Ernie L's Ford. Lyle H., and myself were in the Mercedes. No problem in getting to Helmstedt, other than we only had one beer opener and we were told not to stop while on the autobahn. But we worked it out. The fair was jammed with visitors. The most popular exhibit was the U.S. pavilion, mainly because the bathrooms had hot running water. We utilized our sleeping bags and pup tents during our visit. A small gas stove was used to heat the pork and beans purchased at the PX . Who said that you cannot live on B&B ( beans and beer) ? Ernie L. had a radio in his Ford. The only station that he was able to pick up was broadcast in Flemish which was impossible to understand.
From the Fair, we made our way to Paris. Through some bad luck and unreliable navigation our 'convoy' became fragmented. Paris is a very large city! We never saw the Ford until we returned to Berlin. The problem with becoming separated was that Sgt. H. and I did not have any money. Bill H. in the lost Ford, had three hundred dollars and said that he would 'bank roll' the five of us. Sgt. H. and I slept in the car at the base of the Eiffel tower two nights thinking that the wayward Ford would drive by and rescue us. That didn't happen. We even tried to sell one of our GI issue, OD in color, blankets on the local economy. Because of the large U.S. marking on it we were offered only a few francs about 25 cents in script. No sales at that time. It was decided that we had better head toward Berlin. We still had a few cans of beans left, and one 'jeep' can of gasoline. We made it to Germany before running out of gas. Have you ever attempted to pour gas out of a 'jeep' can into a 2 inch opening to the gas tank without a funnel ? As we were trying to solve our predicament an older German walked up and asked what was the problem? We explained it the best we could. He said you dumb Americans ! I can not understand how you won the war. He then asked if we had a rain coat, which we each had. He then inserted the sleeve into the gas tank and we were able to pour the gas into the opening at the shoulder of the rain coat with little or no spillage. We made it to Helmstedt where we had our first meal in 3 or 4 days .Then on to, 110 dash miles behind the iron curtain, Berlin.
One reason why I enlisted in the Army was to be able to ski in the Alps, plus being able to attend a Photo school. I was able to ski two weeks in the Alps each winter, mostly in Garmisch , Innsbruck and Zermatt. I had my ski boots sent over from the states which were stored in my wall locker. During the few room inspections that I was "forced into standing" the inspectors would ask about the ski boots and forget the military aspect of the inspection. Due to the excellent skiing in Garmisch I extended my tour for six months thus the 3 years in Berlin.
Earlier I mentioned meeting and photographing Congressman Ford and his wife Betty at their arrival at Tempelhof. After my discharge I became an Industrial Photographer with an Aerospace Company. The Manager of our Customer Relations department spent a great deal of time ( and money) in Washington DC. One of his many contacts was Congressman Ford who became VP Ford and then President Ford. Both the manager of CR and Mr. Ford were skiers. Within the Photo Dept. there was a photographer who could turn right and turn left and also stop while on skies. This photographer was also fortunate to marry an attractive and talented lady who was an excellent skier. On many occasions the Wilsons were privileged to be invited to ski and socialize with the manager of CR and the Ford family, ( two sons and one daughter), but not Mrs. Ford. Due to the rewarding photographic assignments that were made available to me in Berlin I seriously considered making a career in the Army. The reason that keep me from it was a personality conflict with a certain noncommissioned officer within Signal Company, who did not believe in god, he thought he was god. A wise old sage told me if I could not say anything good about a SOB don't say anything. Mine was a very interesting and rewarding profession to say the least, I was able to spend over 40 years doing what started out as a hobby. Retiring with most of my hair and a big belly.

After about nine or eleven days, this cruise ship stopped in a place called Bremerhaven, and they told me to get off and get on some kind of train. A duty train, I think. Boy, was I ready for that train. After the normal hurry up and wait, our train finally left for Berlin. We stopped in this town called Frankfurt first, and they told us we would have two hours before we left for Berlin, and we could get off the train and walk and stretch. I was 19 remember, and they didn't have bier on that cruise ship. Just our luck a bar, right on the corner. A few of us got our first taste of Germany there, were very impressed. We sat on the bar stools sipping on our third and I had to go. I backed off that stool, and the next thing I knew, my buddy was getting me off the floor. Seems this good tasting bier had more kick to it than I was use to. Anyway back to the train, and on to Berlin.

Don't remember a whole lot about the ride from Frankfurt to Berlin, except there was some funny looking guys that would keep stopping our train every so often, like we didn't have any business on their tracks. Didn't understand what they were doing then, but I learned at a later date, cause there were a lot more of these heavy armed guys surrounding Berlin. At that very point, my being there got to be a real serious thing to me.

When I finally got to Berlin, my assigned duty was with the FDC (Fire Direction Center) of Mortar Battery, 2^nd Battle Group, 6^th Infantry. I had never even seen a 4.2 mortar, and now I was going to tell the guns where to send those shells. Now this did scare me. I found out real soon though, that the procedure was just about the same as the 105's we trained on.

My memories of Berlin are so many Reinhard. As a junior member of the section, I was assigned as driver of one of our 3/4 ton trucks. Old MR-14 was my baby. That meant that I got to give her all her baths, and keep her ready for inspection at ALL times. I worked a lot of days in the motor pool over close to the stockade. I would work for days on that truck, and I can't tell you how many gallons of OD paint I used on it. Any time an IG inspection was coming up, out came the paint and brushes. Paint the under-carriage, under the hood, under the fender wells, and any place there was a place. I would have that baby shining like a new nickel, and it NEVER failed that someone would turn on that wailing siren, and someone would yell ALERT. Usually, for some reason, it was always raining. I often wondered if they planned it that way just so I would have to drive old MR-14 out there in the mud of the Grunewald.

Ah Memories, Reinhard-----how many are there. Millions, I brought a piece of Berlin home with me in my heart, and there it has remained all these years.

My billet on McNair was in between 4 Ring & the long Movie theater / snack bar / PX / bank building on post of the compound. Right next to it was the main street which connected the main gate on Goerzallee & a side gate on Osteweg, its opposite far end. The barracks building was shaped like a big 'U'. In its middle was our huge parking lot. Here we had our daily inspections, there we also have loaded & un-loaded our vehicles. We, but also other small units had the separate motor pool which was located on post next to the back gate & the stockade of McNair Bks. Most of the other McNair units used the 2 huge motor pools across of McNair's main gate on Goerzallee. (off post)

If we left our motor pool by that back gate, the street straight ahead, name of it was 'Seehofstrasse', led us to the Grunewald practice areas. First we passed 'Girl-Watchers-Corner', big intersection down by Teltower Damm/ Clayallee/ Berliner Str. There, next to a Woolworth store and several bus stops we always have seen pretty girls, - many nice frauleins ! Their smile always made our day! After it we drove down Onkel-Tom-Str. or Fischerhuettenstr., both ended at the edge of the Grunewald. From McNair an easy ride of about 3 miles & we were there. To the woods of the Wannsee area ( called Dauerwald) it took a bit longer. It were about 7-8 miles to get there,- places next to Rose Range, the Brigade Golf course, TV-tower on Schaeferberg next to Koenigstrasse or Peacock-Island chaussee. Nice woods also were there plus the long nice beaches along the Wannsee with all the pretty girls in the summertime.

Yes, I have been to my share of the GI bars, the names escape me except for the Green Laterne ('Green streetlight'), which you have to know that we re-named the Green Latrine. Then there was the New York City bar, my favorite. Must have danced a hundred miles in there to 'It's All In The Game'. Many a tear has to fall, but it's all in the game. Oh mercy! And now I am 69 years. Memories, so many Reinhard. And yes, every night, at least one time, an MP and his German counterpart would come in and just walk around and look to see if anyone needed escorted out. ( so-called bar checks) Think was too early for you then, so I didn't see you there.

The GI bars were not the real Berlin though my friend. It took me a while to find this out and figure out that there was much more to that big, big City. I came to love the German people, the food, and the City. If I ever get to come back, the first thing I want to do is find a Currywurst Stand. I loved those things. When we would come back off pass, usually a little before midnight, I would get off the BVG bus A53, or the streetcar ('Strassenbahn') right there by the front gate. Across the street from the front gate, there was always this old man and his little stand which he sold Currywurst from. I think he stayed open every night till all the GI's came in off pass. Would always get some from him. He got to where he knew me, and would have mine ready if he saw me coming. Also next to the back gate of McNair, on Osteweg, was a great Currywurst stand. Oh man, I still can see and smell all that fine food!

Berlin is a beautiful city. Even in 1958, West Berlin was a quite modern place. I had the pleasure of taking two service club tours through the Brandenburg, and into East Berlin. We were only allowed on the main street, and only got off the bus in a couple of places. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. You would pass these buildings with beautiful store fronts, but if you could see down some of the side streets and alleys, you could see that the buildings were still in a bombed out state. I thought to myself, now there is a true picture of what Communism is all about. I actually hurt for those people then. There was no wall up yet, but there was still a wall. A barbed wire fence, the GDR, and their dogs was a pretty good wall. God Bless You Berliners, it took a long time, but good finally won over evil. I believe it always will.

During my days in Mortar Battery, the only way we could get any real practice shooting our mortars, was to take those 'Blessed vacations' to Wildflecken, Hohenfels, and Grafenwoehr ranges. Told you I can't spell that last one, but anyone that has been there, knows what it is. Seems like we would go down for summer vacations, and winter vacations. We would stay a long time, and let me tell you, those were some cold, cold places. All the snow & mud, unbelievable! But we got a lot of good live fire exercises there, and had not for them, the gun bunnies wouldn't have known which end to put the shell in. Just kidding, we had a bunch of good gun crews. I would have fought with them any day. Granted, 4.2 mortars were not a lot, but that was all we had. Guess Berlin wasn't allowed to have larger artillery pieces. We could inflict a lot of damage with those things if we ever got them zeroed in and fired for effect. A lot of people called them scatter guns, but they could be pretty accurate. It all depended on each and every person doing his job right, and if they did, we could drop a round in a swimming pool.

Can't remember the name of the place, but there was a cafe down in Ku-Damm area that had the absolute best and biggest Wiener-Schnitzel ( breaded pork slice ) that I ever saw. I may have spelled that wrong but I don't feel bad because my computer can't spell it either. It was about like the one that you were holding up, Reinhard, in your website 'food' section. The thing was, that in 1958, it was only about a buck or so. I could take five dollars to town with me, and have a blast. 1 Mark for a bier. Me, I loved the Beck's. So many memories!

This girl I met and dated for a year showed me a lot of Berlin that I would never have seen by myself. She was a pretty little blond haired, blue eyed doll, and she was very young and still in school. I would go to her house and eat supper with her family a lot, and they made me feel like I was at home. She worked part time in a music store somewhere in the Ku-Damm area. Everything was legal with us. She would take me to the German movies, where I didn't understand a whole lot except when the Three Stooges or Mighty Mouse cartoon came on. I think then I laughed even more that she did. I will tell you what she did with me one night. She said she was taking me somewhere new. Well, we turned and went down this dimly lit alley that seemed to go forever, then went down steps to a basement door, up a dimly lit hallway for ten miles, then up three flights of stairs, and about the second flight, I began to hear music. We came to these two huge doors with a guard there. By this time, I was getting a little shaky. The guard just smiled at us and opened the door without hesitating. It opened up into the biggest dance floor and bar that I have ever been in. There were live bands. We sat at a table and I got a bier. The music stopped, and the announcer started talking about something, and he called Monika's name. I am blank. Let me tell you, that little girl got up and went up to that mike and started belting out American Rock and Roll tunes like crazy. I sat there with my mouth open. She had a really big and beautiful voice, and I had not known this. We went there several times after that, and I have yet to pay for my bier there. I was the only American in the place, and there must have been at least 300 people there. Ah Memories, Reinhard. I owe a lot of my good memories of Berlin to her, and I will tell you her name at another place and time.

Then, I remember the guard duty that we would pull in the down town area. I think it was in a building that they called the 4 Powers, or something like that. It was where the American, French, British, and Russians all had there offices. We got to carry 45's there, and that was a real relief from the carbines. We were suppose to salute all the officers when they came to work in the morning, and let me tell you, that was a chore trying to keep up with all the rank insignia. I probably saluted a few privates just so I wouldn't miss an officer. The Russians were real butt's. I saluted what I think was a Russian officer, and he just stopped and glared at me. Me being a Texan, I just glared back at him. He spoke something in Russian, then turned and stomped off. Guess I did good because I never got any back lash from it. The best post there was the one outside on the side walk at the front gate of the place. It was a pretty hard place to keep your guard composure though. All the pretty frauleins that came by would always give you a pretty smile, and some would want to talk to you. We really were not suppose to talk to them, but I have to be honest, it was impossible not to talk to some of them. I think they knew we couldn't resist a pretty girl.

I remember the flag football games we had on the field behind the PX. I am also sending to you in that mailing a sleeve patch that Mortar Battery was given as runner-up one year. Headquarters Co. won the last game over us by 1 point that year to win the championship. We had some pretty rough games sometimes for flag football. Got a tooth knocked through my lower lip that year. Took several stitches in it. It was just another one of those things that I did just to be able to do something different with my time. We spent a lot of time inside those fences of McNair, and anything to pass time helped. I've seen the pictures you have posted of old McNair, and my heart is glad and sad at the same time, I am glad for the people of Berlin that they are free and don't need us there any more, and at the same time sad to see the place in such sad shape. I can see so many footprints in all of those pictures. Maybe no one else can see them, but I can. Thousands of GI's have been in and out of there! They can tear the buildings down, Reinhard, but they will never be able to erase all the memories and the spirit that are in that legendary place.

For one of my Soldier of the Month awards, I got to take a chopper tour of the city. The pilot had one place in particular that he wanted to take me over. It was a famous nudist beach at the Grunewaldsee! I couldn't help but notice in some of the pictures, that Reinhard knows where it is also. Just another memory of that beautiful city. I really enjoyed seeing Berlin from the air.
Would you believe, when I left Berlin, they put me back on that very same cruise ship that they sent me over on, the USS Butner.

Hello Reinhard, my name is Robert Casey, my friends call me Bob or Opa. The passed weeks I have been looking and reading many of the story's from my fellow Berliner's , Boy o' Boy ! What a nice 'memory lane'! . I think I'm forgetting a lot of words now but I had to write you when I've seen your website. I having a problem trying to remembering names of people and places I have been but I do have the memories. I'm 72 years old now.

I really enjoyed my tour of duty when I was stationed in Berlin Tempelhof , across the street of TCA Airbase. I was in the 2^nd Battalion, 6^th Infantry, Fox Co, heavy weapons platoon. We were the only outfit there until later around 1957 when we had moved to McNair barracks. I also guarded Spandau Prison many times. From 1958, I belonged to the 3^rd Battle Group, 6^th Inf., Delta Co.

The best of my Berlin duty time was a wonderful gift, then in 1955, I've met a beautiful Berliner girl. Her name was Ellen Stohr, we got married and had a beautiful baby girl born on New Years Day in 1958. We also had two more wonderful children. My wife Ellen, the Big Love of my life, has passed away due to lung cancer on January 31, 2003.

Before I begin to tell my story, it's for sure a bit different to all the others, I like to show some photos of my duty time. Sometimes it's for me like yesterday, the life runs by like a movie, but nobody can turn back the time. It's speeding away without mercy and after the time is gone you very often realize much too late how good it once has been to you.

How do you go on after you lose the best that life will ?

I met this beautiful Berliner girl back in 1955, her name was Ellen Stohr. She was nineteen, living alone, and taking care of herself working a full time job in Berlin. When I met Ellen, something came over me that I never felt before. I was also very young at eighteen, and did not know what love felt like, or knew anything about it. It's fifty-four years later, and I still have that feeling I felt back than, but I do know what it's all about now, thanks to Ellen, - it's called Love !

How do you go on after you lose the best that life will offer, I don't know. It's very hard to imagine continuing down the path without my best friend, my partner, my care-taker and healer but most of all, my beloved wife !

My Best Friend, - I could not have had a better or closer friend than my wife Ellen. We went and did everything most of our life together, she would always make sure that I was happy in what ever we were doing at all times, never thinking of herself. She had told me many times, she gets all her enjoyment out of seeing me being happy.

When I would be out on training mission in the Grunewald , Ellen would come out there on her bike to bring me cheese and sausage. Often I ate much better than our officers. She had a long and dangerous ride on her bicycle. From Tempelhof, her home district, (next to the airport), it was an 1 good hour intensive ride to get into the Grunewald. Then she probably followed our fresh tire tracks until finally she has found me! She always did! She was my Angel! After that she had the same hard way back home through all the traffic, again another hour !

Ellen would always put me first, I was not as good at it as she was, she would always have time to listen to my problems, and fears, she would always comfort me in many ways. She would talk to me as a friend, and convince me that I could do and become what ever I aim for. I would lose confidence in myself many of times because of my lack of education. And if it wasn't for her strength and encouragement I would not have this comfortable life I have today.

Partners, we would always make sure we didn't ever think that one of us is better than the other. Again Ellen was better at this than me. We had always believe in, 'it's better to give then to receive'. To have a long life together, you should meet each other half way. I always felt house work was harder than my day job, I would try to meet Ellen half way around the house, but she would not let me, as long as she knew that I realized it was a partnership also in the house work, and was willing to help.

Care-Taker and Healer, I could not possibly explain all that Ellen would go though to make me, or any of our children comfortable when any one of us was ill. She had some of her old German remedies her grandmother used on her, and believe me when I say this. She would make us feel good being sick, sometimes I think we were looking forward to be sick to get the loving care she would give us. I really don't remember Ellen ever staying in bed when she was sick, she would get me and the kids off to work and school, and then take care of herself. She never had a care taker when she needed one.

Forty-Seven years being with the same women is a gift from God, you may have heard the old saying. 'A marriage made in heaven'. Our marriage was made on earth, we made our own paradise, we were given three beautiful angles, and they given us ten beautiful white doves that we named our grandchildren.

Ellen is the most considerate person I ever met in my seventy-two years. If Ellen knew your birth date or wedding anniversary, you certainly would expect a card in the mail. Ellen would always carry two or three baggies full of candy in her purse in case she would meet someone she knew with a child in hand.

Ellen always carried a cassette tape in her purse for a special nephew who would always knew she would have one for him no matter when and where they would meet. Steve is 51 now and still looks for the tape.

Ellen would always call our three children and their spouses, plus all ten grandchildren on their birthdays and sing 'Happy Birthday' to each and every one of them over the phone on their special day every year.

We don't own a pet any more in our late years, but that does not stop Ellen from taking care of the neighborhood cats and dogs. I have to go to the store to buy 25lb bags of cat food because we have seven friends who come by for breakfast every morning and dinner every night. There will be a box of dog bones on the grocery list for the two neighbors dogs, and she will also have a couple of bones in her purse for any dogs she will meet at the duck pond.

Speaking of the duck pond, we went there twice a day to feed the Canadian geese, the ducks, and many types of birds. I go to the discount store and buy the out of date bread for her.

So is it worth all this? Just for LOVE...

WHAT IS LOVE? ? Ellen could have written a book on this subject. Imagine yourself living in your country, and you fall in love with someone from some other country, you both don't understand each others language, but after a few months you know you wanted to marry each other and did so. Well it certainly is a big decision for the person who will have to leave their country which is you, and you will be leaving your family and friends, your doctors and medical history behind. Won't be able to speak your own language any more, you will have to learn a new language. You won't even have any of the above that was mention in your new country when you get there. Can you imagine the fear you would experience when you stop, and start to think what if I am not excepted in to the family when I go to this new country. And what if I don't like this new country, I will be all alone with no family or friends to help me if needed. You will have no one but your spouse. It's certainly scary. There is power and strength in love, you must prevent it from drying. Love can ease pain and discomfort, it can make you feel seven feet tall, with the strength of atlas. Love can also destroy as well. So you must work hard to keep it alive. Ellen knew how to do just that, our love for each other today is as strong if not stronger then the day we meet. You may be wondering how did she keep the fire of love going for so many years. She had her ways. Ellen had her ways of saying I love you every day of our lives. She would write 'I love you', or leave a note on my napkin when she made my lunch bag for work, with a Hershey Chocolate Kiss. Many of nights I would go to bed first, and there would be some kind of present on my pillow. The gift would be something that I mention I wanted in a conversation with her, or she over heard me telling someone. She still does it to this day. I know this one will be hard to believe, but it's true, Ellen would always shine my shoes every night before going to bed. She would not let me go out to work or any where with out my shoes being shined. She believed it was the wife's job to do this even after I tried to tell her she doesn't have to do it. She truly believed it's a way the wife can tell her husband how much she loves him and cares for him, and she would not stop. Ellen would put out my clothes when I had to go any where, she would always make sure I had the right outfit, and left the house looking smart.

In most houses the man of the house would cut and serve the dinners meat. Not in my house, Ellen wanted to do it because she believed in that the man of the house is the bread winner, and should get the best cut of the meat, and any thing else. Ellen brought up our children that Dad comes first, then she would say then the children comes next, and she would take what's left, that's the way it was.

Even right up to the day she passed a way, she said to my daughter Joan, I am worried about your father, what is he going to do by himself. He can't boil water. 'Please Joan watch over him when I'm gone', I heard her say that while I was making some soup for her out in our kitchen. Tears rolled down my face, I went back in and gave Ellen her soup, and a great big hug, another tears fall.

Ellen would make sure that I am first. If and when I have to go out without her, she will not relax until I return home, she constantly worries about me that I'm ok. Because we did everything together, you seen me, you can assure Ellen is not far behind. Ellen would not come home from shopping without some kind of gift for me. I have every tool you can think of, because Ellen would see some tool and say to our daughter, 'I don't think Dad has this one' and well buy it. I have a large baseball memorabilia collection, cards, balls, bats, photo's, you name it I got it thanks to Ellen. She bought 90 percent of it for me. She will not come home without some kind of baseball memorabilia for me.

My beloved wife Ellen had lung cancer, and she passed away on January 31, 2003. The sunshine of my life was gone forever. So now maybe you can understand when I say that my world has come to the end.